By Lane and Lucy Pease
While picking papers up off the floor, I came across my fourteen year-old daughter’s monologue she had written for her drama class. Of course, I read it after all if it is on the floor of the hallway it is fair game. Reading it, I realized she expressed so clearly how the death of a parent affects a child even if they have no memories of the parent. After wiping away me tears, I asked her if I could share it as a part of the trainings I do as well as a part of our blog. She agreed. I am proud of her accomplishments as a student, singer, and actress, but most of all I am proud of her kindness and compassion. I am so lucky to have traveled this journey with both my daughters and I know their father would be very proud. Here is Lucy’s monologue:
My father passed away from cancer when I was nine-months old. It has impacted me more than anything ever has in my life. Sometimes, it gets really hard to think about what my life would have been like if I had him by my side, watching me grow up. I wish I would have had him here for things like teaching me how to ride a bike or helping me through my first break up with a boy. I didn’t have a dad to take me to the father-daughter dance. Also, things that will happen to me in the future like learning to drive or being walked down the aisle. Those things I wish he could be there for. I know it’s hard to understand, but I miss him and the memories we could’ve made together. My friends don’t understand. When I tell people how young I was when he died, they think it’s not a big deal because I don’t remember him. They don’t know what it’s like. They don’t know what it’s like to never know one of the people who created them. I can’t be mad or upset with them because they don’t understand. I don’t go one day without my dad and the love I have for him passing my mind. I try to live my life in his honor and think that he would be proud of me and my achievements.
Lane Pease is program director at Kate’s Club. Her daughter Lucy is a freshman in high school and her daughter, Zelda is in her first year of college.