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Grief in Real Time

Date
March 6, 2012
Author
Kate's Club
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Grief in Real Time
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For the past year, I had the pleasure of being a blogger for the Grief Awareness blog and sharing stories with our community. Since then we have added bloggers, received over 10,000 hits, and today our 100th blog post.  I am honored to be the blogger that gets to write this milestone post.

Picture of Grandad at one of our favorite burger joints, Spechts, in Bulverde, Texas
Grandad at one of our favorite burger joints, Spechts, in Bulverde, Texas

In a strange twist of fate, as I type this post, I am sitting next to my grandfather who we moved to hospice yesterday. Even in hospice, Grandad is a larger-than-life personality… the guy is simply put, a fighter. In 1976, five years before I was born, he had his first heart bypass surgery. After several bypass surgeries, stints and a pacemaker later, his poor heart can’t keep up anymore.  He went to the hospital last Wednesday, and we got the call to go ahead and make the trip to Texas last Friday.

Picture of me, Grandad, and my cousin, Katie this past Thanksgiving
Me, Grandad, and my cousin, Katie this past Thanksgiving

Over the last several days of sitting with him in the hospital and now in hospice… these are my initial reactions to the grief I am currently experiencing…

  1. Grief really is like waves. At moments I am overcome by sadness and at other moments, I am just so happy that we can sit and laugh with him for a bit longer.
  2. Grief is different for everyone. My mother and her sister have been by his side since he arrived at the hospital last week.  Their ability to make difficult decisions with such grace in spite of the emotions they are having is inspiring.
  3. Grief is easier when you are surrounded by those who are most important to you. Since the troops arrived Saturday, his room has never had fewer than six people in it. Yesterday alone he had 25 visitors. People have come from several states and driven many hours to tell him goodbye. It is awesome to know people think he is just as incredible as I do.
  4. Kate Atwood said it best… Grief is love. My grandparents will have been married 67 years next Wednesday. When we arrive each morning my grandmother sits down next to his bed, he opens his hand, she places hers in it and they just sit there for hours. He said it best yesterday when he looked up at her and said, “I’ve just always loved this girl”.
Picture of me kissing Granddad o the cheek
#1 Grandad

I promise to continue to share my family's journey over the next few days. Thank you for giving me a place to tell OUR story.

Would you like to share your story? Please get in touch with Kate's Club! KC has free grief support with grief resources, grief counseling resources, grief training, and volunteer work in Atlanta and surrounding places in Georgia. Kate's Club is a growing nonprofit in Atlanta with grief specialists for kids and young adults going through bereavement. Our goal is to make a world where it is okay to grieve.

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